“Beware of dogs, beware of evil workers, beware of the concision.” Philippians 3:2
Christmas in September. Pastor Douglas Wilson of Christ Church in Moscow, Idaho, hand delivered the gift that keeps on giving with his blog post A Tether Ball in a Tornado, wherein he issued his declaration of independence from all authority, including his own, as well as any sense of decency:
So if someone with a long enough face to be a dowager from Human Resources tells me that I am no longer permitted, as a cis-white-male, to make any observations or comparisons, metaphorical or otherwise, about any aspect of the female anatomy, guess what I am going to do? Guess what my next blog post is going to be about?
Go on, guess. (Blog & Mablog, A Tether Ball in a Tornado, September 18, 2017)
To my knowledge this was the first time he ever documented his defiance in writing so clearly and unequivocally. Normally he veils it with self-righteous godspeak. But here he used very plain & direct English to remove possible confusion. He leaves no question about what he thinks of the CREC Review Committee, as well as who actually runs the CREC,1 which brings us to the first point: The Presiding Minister of the CREC compared the Presiding Ministers of the CREC to a dowager, which is “a widow holding property or a title from her deceased husband” (Merriam-Webster):
“So if someone with a long enough face to be a dowager from Human Resources tells me that I am no longer permitted, as a cis-white-male, to make any observations or comparisons, metaphorical or otherwise, about any aspect of the female anatomy. . .” (A Tether Ball in a Tornado)
He means that to the extent the CREC Presiding Ministers enjoy title or reputation, it’s because of him. They didn’t earn their position; he gifted it to them. And he doesn’t simply mean their position on the Review Committee (“Human Resources”); he means their titles as “Presiding Ministers” in his denomination. Douglas Wilson is an exceptional wordsmith. He understands correct grammar and has a huge vocabulary that he wields to precisely cut his victims in the most painful location. He didn’t accidently write “dowager.” He deliberately chose that term.
Douglas Wilson also smithed a clever double entendre with the word “dowager.” First, he insulted dowagers by comparing them to the feckless CREC Presiding Ministers; second, he insulted the CREC Presiding Ministers by comparing them to a woman:
“if . . . a dowager from Human Resources tells me that I am no longer permitted . . . to make any observations or comparisons . . . about any aspect of the female anatomy. . .”
He’s saying, “I won’t let these women [the Presiding Ministers] tell me that I cannot humiliate those women.” And he intends this insult to cut every bit as deep as “small-breasted biddies.” The CREC holds a patriarchal worldview2 in a Cub Scout sort of way. A few boys built a tree fort where girls can’t play. Nevertheless, in their subculture it’s an affront for one man to call another man a woman. The Presiding Minister of the CREC just called the Presiding Ministers of the CREC a little old widow. Frankly, I’m surprised he didn’t ridicule them for the size of their chests.
And I’m pretty sure this sentence also means that for all intents and purposes he’s dead to the Presiding Ministers. A dowager is a widow, therefore someone died. The CREC Review Committee, or at least those who successfully inserted the language that wounded his self-love (narcissism), should beware. When he’s dead to you, then he has bad intentions for you and for your church. Yes, this sounds melodramatic. But of all the people who should know better, the leaders of the CREC stand front & center. In 2006 Doug Wilson split Andrew Sandlin’s CREC church to settle a personal score. The leaders of the CREC nodded their heads in approval because they understood their role in life is to vindicate Mr. Wilson’s sin. However, this time some Presiding Ministers didn’t obey the rules. They should not feel ambushed when he exacts vengeance. It’s coming. He “bites back” (emphasis his).
Let’s not forget the facts. Doug Wilson committed incomprehensible evil; the CREC Presiding Ministers winked at it; and then he compared them to a privileged woman who didn’t earn her worth. If you ask me, they earned his insults and more. These cowards refused to defend a helpless 2½-year-old child from his father and from his pastor; and they refused to protect Natalie from her former pastor when he was “breathing out threatenings and slaughter” against her (Acts 9:1). They had an affirmative moral obligation to remedy the wrong that he did but they abdicated. Now the dog at Mablog is biting back. I don’t feel sorry for them. They deserve it.
1 In the next paragraph he compares the Presiding Ministers to Ahab while cloaking himself as Elijah:
And don’t bother trying to tell me that I am being a troubler of Israel. That is what Ahab said to Elijah. Right. The guy who imported all the idols and brought the wrath of Heaven down on his nation, he is the one who wanted to pretend that the man who opposed it all from the beginning should take responsibility. (A Tether Ball in a Tornado)
2 It’s faux patriarchy but they embrace it nonetheless. A true biblical patriarch would have cut Steven Sitler’s throat without giving it a second thought. No patriarch would have protected the child molester. Ditto for Jamin Wight. The CREC uses “patriarchy” as an excuse to act tough, but these empty collars wouldn’t last long in a real patriarchal society.